One day when I get old and not able to look after myself, I wish that my family members do not have to suffer looking after me. I wish that I still have the mental faculty to know what I am subjecting my family to in worrying for me. Old age can result in a person being unreasonable and demanding without him knowing it. He may not help it. This is a real scenario.
This is a dilemma and we are torn between filial piety and not being a burden to your loved ones. I have great respect for caregivers who look after old people. These are family members, domestic helpers and nurses. The work is made harder if the old people has mild form of dementia or has irrational compulsive behaviour.
Patience can wear very thin if we have to deal with someone, especially your aged parents, who happen to be that. If we do not pamper to their wishes, we would be branded as unfilial. There is this internal struggle and guilt we have to face with. We know that the aged person has needs to cater to and the caregivers have their lives to lead. Both needs will not meet.
How do we address this issue?
For a start, begin working on yourself before the fateful days come. We too will grow old. What can we do to reduce the burden on others? This is a big topic and it is not too late to ponder about it.